I am Black, I have a family and I am a man. That says it all. I am the underdog and I am grateful, in some ways, for that. I embrace pain, privilege and persecution. I am part of a legacy of men who have protected and taken off. For all that is written in the media that I do not exist, I am telling you that I do. I'm right here! And there are plenty more of "me" lurking around. I just moved from New York City to Atlanta and have found that lots of Black men down here -- who are not gay -- are married. Wedding rings everywhere: young guys, old guys, tall guys, short guys and lots of fat guys. In NYC I have a little crew of married dudes that I know, and I am proud to know that like me, they got duped into doing something they're not sure they would do again. But down here, brothas actually seem to like being married . It's an interesting and terrifying phenomena.
Look, before I continue, please know that I love my wife. These are just jokes (kind of) and I don't want anyone assuming that I am a disrespectful ogre giving married Black men a bad name. My wife is happy (I think) and just so you know, she and I adopted a code of ethics a long time ago that can be summed up in one catch phrase: "no beatin', no cheatin'." That's it. That's how we propose to stay together. I'm a decent fellow: not too rude and not too soft, but more than anything, I am real.
So welcome to my world where I will pontificate on everything that races through my mind as well as respond to any questions or comments you may have. I hope I make you think, laugh, cry, communicate and come home before 3am. I think it is best that we go through this together. Trust me, we need more than God. Marriage, regardless of color, is not for the weak. It is the hardest thing we'll ever do with the greatest potential. I just hope that it helps me get to Heaven without driving me to go play in traffic in order to get there.
Until next time -
BFM
