97% percent of the time, my son can do no wrong in my eyes. He’s a great kid; curious, personable, friendly, affectionate, athletic and amazingly witty for a three-year-old. As far as children go, I wouldn’t trade him for the world. He’s everything my wife and I wanted when we conceived almost four-years ago. Some may say that 97% is a high number for a perfect child but I do mean it. Even when he does things wrong at school or at home, I am learning to forgive him because 1) he’s still three and 2) who I am to judge his faults when I have more of my own. And it’s these faults, or even personality traits, that we have in common that make up the three percent that are excruciatingly frustrating.
I love myself and, simultaneously, I hate myself. Sound familiar? I am a leader in a certain situations but have been known to follow knuckleheads in others. I am a husband, father, educator, mentor, moral-authority, devout church-goer and tither yet I cannot stand talking to my own mother. I am a walking contradiction. I cry at almost every movie from The Karate Kid to 8 Below (the movie about dogs surviving in
Why does he have to be like me?!!! (Well, duh…) I would love for him not to be so sensitive. I want him to be “tough” and play football and not wince in phony pain when he is hit in basketball or baseball. I’m a hypochondriac and he is too. Everything needs a band-aid and we both love medicine. While my wife is the poker-faced, non-emotional partner (shouldn’t that be the dude?) my son and I carry the burden of being cool dudes with emotional issues. Studs who cry. I so want my kid to be himself and not follow in my footsteps for this three percent. But I think it’s too late. My twin was born thirty years after me.
2 comments:
Always be you son! Pastor B dropped the ILL message today about self concept vs. self esteem. Self concept is the person I think I ought to be and could be. Self esteem is how I feel about who I am. It's the ideal vs. the reality. In the end, it all boils down to relationships, truth and time...all of which we need patience with to mature on the journey! We're all growing...keep up the good work BFM...we need more MEN like you :)
Awe, this was cute. I understand how you feel, completely and I agree w/with BG said. You shouldn't be mad at yourself for who you are. And there's nothing wrong with a man who is touch with his emotions. We need more of 'em, so let your son be himself too. Kids want to be like their parents, especially when they're cool, fun, loving and nurturing. Once he sees you loving and being comfortable with yourself, he'll feel the same way about himself. And that's one of the most important things you can teach him.
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